Steps Out Of Jealousy

A young man said to me: “I’m a quiet person, and I’m in love with a girl, but I’m jealous. I get jealous when I see her having a good time with a crowd. She gave me up because of this jealousy and says she won’t take me back unless I get over my jealousy. How can I?” That is a good question. I shared with him steps he should take out of jealousy into freedom.

First – Fix it in your mind that jealousy is self-defeating. Nothing whatsoever is to be gained by it except one’s own increasing frustration. If you want to gain the love of another by the method of jealousy, it only makes you less lovable. It is difficult to love a jealous person. It is a bad strategy.

Second – By a deliberate act surrender that jealousy into the hands of God. You can’t handle it, but you can consent for Him to handle it. Give it to Him. From this moment on, He has it, and you are now to look to
Him and obey.

Third – Consider whether you should confess your jealousy to the person of whom you are jealous. In talking over the matter you may discover that the other will offer suggestions that will lift the whole matter to a higher plane. And the jealousy will drop away.

Fourth – Think and say everything good you can say about the person of whom you are jealous. This will dissolve the jealousy by good will.

Fifth – Not only think and say all the things you can about that person, but also do things that will further him. Look for chances of boosting him – not in talk only, but in sincerity. In doing so, you will go up in
your own eyes and in the eyes of others. And you will go up in fact.

Sixth – Fulfill this verse “So let us concentrate on the things that make for harmony, and on the growth of one another’s character”–Romans 14:19, Phillips. You are a Christian, and you can be a Christian only as you try to Christianize others.

Seventh – Whenever you think of that person, think of him in prayer. Send out waves of prayer for him. They will come back and wash your own soul clean of all jealousy and envy.

Ask the Lord to give you a loving attitude toward all and especially toward those of whom you are jealous. Be determined that envy and jealousy will have no part of you, for Jesus has all of you.